Many people with scoliosis have heard comments they didn't like. I have! And it still happens, believe it or not...
Thinking about this, I decided to make a post with tips on what to avoid saying for those who live or know someone with a deformity.
"You're exaggerating, it's not that bad": Minimizing someone's experience with scoliosis is disrespectful and disregards their reality. Each person experiences the condition differently, and their experiences should be validated. It's legitimate when those of us with scoliosis say that we feel crooked and don't like what we see in the mirror. Others should consider this. Embrace and try to better understand the feelings of those with scoliosis, as it's not an easy condition to deal with.
"Your spine is strange" or "Your posture is ugly": Negative comments about a person's physical appearance can harm their self-esteem.
"You don't need to wear the brace for so long": It's normal for family or friends to want to alleviate the suffering of someone wearing a brace, but encouraging the opposite of what doctors recommend is counterproductive, as it will delay or hinder treatment. Understand the pain, and provide support, but always follow the guidance of the healthcare team.
"You should try harder to correct this": Often, people with scoliosis are already doing their best to manage their condition, whether through orthopedic braces, physiotherapy with specific exercises, or even surgery. Pressuring them to do more can be insensitive and disregard the challenges they are facing.
"Have you tried RPG?": Suggesting unsolicited treatments can be invasive and frustrating for someone with scoliosis, who is likely already receiving professional medical advice and following recommended treatment.
"Be careful with surgery, it's very dangerous": Many scoliosis patients have no option but surgery. And when this is the case, being able to operate is a great victory for many people. Don't impose your fear on someone positive and confident. Instead, encourage and reassure them that everything will be alright.
Instead of those phrases, it's better to offer support, listen carefully to the experiences of those with scoliosis, and ask how you can help if needed. Empathy and understanding are essential when dealing with anyone who has a medical condition.
